My Daddy went to Heaven on Wednesday!

Wed. morning I got a phone call from my mom crying she had lef the hospital earlier that morning at 7:30 and my dad was in great spirits and feelign great. They had watched a flock of white doves outside the window, Dad wanteed meat for breakfast and couldn't wait for the doctor to come in and release him to go home. he had receieved Chemo the day before and had no side effects and he was excited. I later found ou that the Chemo probaly caused the lung cancer to explode. Anyways mom left at 7;30 to go to work , Dad yelled out to her that he loved her and she left. 40 minutes later she was called to return to the hospital that dad had turned for the worst. When she got there he had already passed. When I arrived I was just kind of floating. And I have learned that no matter how ready you are it is still so very hard. I can't even begin to explain how it feels. I hope no one else ever has to experience losing a parent. I know that we all have to die but he was just so young. He was only 59. We are all doing as well as can be expected I guess. visitation tonight was very hard. But We survive. Please keep us in you prayer. I t hit Hunter tonight and he was wanting his Papa to come back. We talked for a long time and I only hope that tiem will heal his little heart. Thank you for the prayers. Tomorrow will be arough day with e funeral.

A fun summer

The summer has been lots of fun with the boys we have been staying busy with lots of fun things to do. We try to playoutsie a lot but it has just been so HOT! Hurricane Harbor has been the favorite place so far. We have been to Six Flags several times but it is just to Hot to be chasing kids their and waiting in line.

For the Fourth of July we went to Granbury for dinner and fireworks. We had a really great time. Hunter met a few boys his age and they had a great time playing together an they even watched the fireworks together.

Here's Hunter and Rusty watching some other kids play ball.


I love this pictures. We were waiting for the fireworks and Rusty was very tired of waiting. So he and Daddy decided to relax. They both had their feet propt up on ice chest.





And here is our family ready to watch the show.





Another big hit was going to see Ronald Mc Donald. I was worried that rusty might be scared or shy becasue lately he has to warm up to people before they are allowed to look at him:)








Here is Rusty watching Ronald enter the building

Rusty and Hunter sat nicley and particiapted the entire show. I was so proud of them. A couple of time Rusty would run up to me and say" Mommy McDonald is Funny" and then he would run back to sit down and watch.


Here they are playing McDonald Says

And here are the two cutest boys taking a picture with McDonald. They had such a great time. My favorite part of that day however was when I was ordering Lunch, Rusty ran up to me in line and Said " Mommy, Mommy, I have to tell you something.....I love you:) And I got a big hug.

Boys can be tough and challenging but moment like these make it all worth wild.

A quick update on my dad. He went home last Tuesday but return to the hospital on Thursday and is still there:( He is suppose to tak Chemo starting the 22nd but I'm not so sure what will happen with him being back in the hospital. he had an infection from too many antibiotics and still feels crummy. Thanks for all the prayers they are appreciate.

More summer fun to come soon:0)

Just a quick update... My dad is still in the hospital but getting stronger every day. HE is receiving radiation to stop the cancer in is lung from bleeding. However he does still have cancer in other parts of his body as well. I think we all hope for some miracle to cure him, but we all know that within time his time will come an end. But so will everyone else. We are just going to enjoy the time we have. Right now he has absolutely NO pain. Which is great ans I hope it stays that way. Most of the time dad is in a great mood and is excited to be alive. He has even spoken of attending church with my mom which he has never done and wants to find what it is that GOD left him here for. However today he was very upset and GRUMPY from no sleep so that was rough on all of us. My mom does not want him to be left alone just in case the doctors come so that we can hear what is next so this week mom went back to work and I have stayed with dad. I have enjoyed the time especially knowing that we never know when it may be taken from us. My kids and Kevin went to Nebraska and I have been home alone. I am so ready for them to return, which means less time at the hospital but that is OK I need a break also. Thanks for those of you that read this and have been praying for my dad. I use to wonder how people who were going through something like this could be so strong and so close to GOD, but I understand now more than ever. You have to be strong and rely on GOD to do his job(whatever it might be).

first week of summer

I have been at the hospital every chance I have to be with mom and dad. They have been preparing us for the worst since he went in the hospital last Tuesday. However last night they were able to take Dad of the respirator!! And he really really wants to talk, but we have to tell him to concentrate on his breathing and get his throat better before he talks. I know he is not fixed but we made it through this part:) You never know what God might do. I read somewhere on someones blog about a family who could not turn the respirator off and I some what understand but I also feel that if there is no improvement that you have to let GOD do his part. God is definitely watching over us.

On another note. Hugely is not the only hospital I have spent time at this week. While washing the car, Hunter decided to ride his bike he hit the water hose and fell chin first. He now has 6 stitches. It looked terrible and he had another smiley face on his chin however he was wasn't smiling at all:( I am so thankful that my neighbor ran over to help. I usually keep myself Calm but I believe it about pushed me over the edge. Here are pictures of hunter and his bad chin. Poor baby!

Please keep praying for my dad he is not out of the woods yet. And Pray for my mom she has only left the hospital once in 8 days. She is cleaning up, eating and sleeping but she has to be exhausted.

My Dad

My dad in the hospital in ICU . He is not doing well. And he does have cancer along with being really sick. He is on a ventilator now. Time will tell wether he will make it off of it. Please pray for him and us too.

One more week of school

Well it has been a little over a month so I guess I have some catching up to do.

Here is Rusty when we came home from the hospital with the PH probe in his nose and his NO! NO! Arms that kept him from ripping the tube out. The beginning of that day was insane but Rusty adjusted well by the after noon and loved mommy sleeping with him that night. He had a little Black box in a bag that I had to chase him around with all day which kept me very busy and Rusty interested to see how many circles he could run me in. Rusty had his Acid Reflux test and we are on some new medication in the morning instead of at night which still doesn't explain the lack of sleep. But his sleeping is slowly getting better. Thank Goodness!!!

My dad is still not in the clear. They have found spots on the lung, liver and kidney and they are doing a brain scan this week. And they are 99% sure it is cancer. They hope to do a biopsy on the liver soon and he is having heart problems. So please Pray that God will comfort him and help us to accept whatever the future holds. When I think about losing him it eats me up. I am trying to be strong but it is really hard to do.

On a happier note! My Rusty is officially been potty trained for about a month or two. It is so nice. he still wears a pull up at night just in case. And let me tell you he is very proud of himself.

I have one more week of school and then I get to stay home with the boys! I can't wait. I look forward to the many fun moments. I just love when I catch them in action playing together and giggling. If you hear giggling something must be going on and usually you can catch them doing something silly. Here are a few pics of them together.

I stuck outside to take this one. They are sitting outside by themselves eating Ice Cream.

Swing Batter Batter

Hunter is doing really well on his basebal team. He no longer lays in the field or spins in circles until the last inning:) They are so cute to watch we do however have a great team. We have not lost a game yet. The other teams appear to be much younger or more immature than our team. You end up cheering for both teams because they are just so cute!

Kevin and I take turns during the games watching Rusty play. He could care less about most of the game. But he still has fun!

Here is Rusty while watching the games. In the top picture he is drawing and below he is watching the game aon a very windy day!

On another note! I feel like I'm losing my mind. My dad went back to the hosptial coughing up blood again after being observed and getting the blood to stop again they sent him home. He has a ct scan next week to find out about the spot on the lungs that they saw this time. We are ot sure if it is the same spot or a new one. He seems to be doing great but he is depressed and tired.

Kevin has been down with his back for a week and will be going to the doctor tomorrow.

Rusty's behavior is going to drive me insane!!!!!!! And Rusty will be admitted as an outpatient next Monday for a scoping of his esophugus and an Ph brobe to test acid levels. They will put him to sleep and then do the scoping and place the probe. We will come home a few hours later with the probe in place and pray that he does not rip it out! Why are we doing this? Well for about a year or more Rusty has not slept many nights! He still wakes up and screams as if he is in pain. He and I spend most of our days exhausted. If I donot give him his acid reflux medicine then we will not get ANY sleep at all just a LONG LONG night!!!!! So finally the doctor has decided to see if it is his acid reflux or something in that area.... I hope this gives us answers. I often wonder is with a good nights rest how Rusty might act. I am reading another book to give me some parenting advice. Most people probably think that we never do anythng but we really do try REALLY hard. Sometimes it is not only exhausting trying to correct him and others reporting his behavior but looking for the perfect advice that will cure him. Maybe the terrible two's will come and go and give me a sweet Rusty all the time. Anyways enough of my problems!

Well alot has been going on! Dad went home and is doing pretty good! He seems angry and I wish I knew how to help! BUt he is making some major life changes and it must be difficult. I get in a bad mood just from not having a DrPepper so I know it must be hard.

We had Easter at our house again this year. It was really strange to not have my mom and dad here to help celebrate. I had a hard time enjoying the day becasue I wanted to be with them, but at the smae time yu just can't miss Easter Egg Hunting with your kids. Hunter had a blast hunting for eggs but Rusty could have cared less. He would pick up an egg and put it back. We did however Easter Egg Hunt at church the week before and he was thrilled with the fact that he could pick up as many as he wanted to. I guess one Hunt was enough for him!

In the last few weeks Rusty has learn to ride his. He just got on one day and took off! The look on his face was priceless! He wants so badly to keep with Hunter but his little legs just can't move fast enough.

Kevin took the traing wheels off of Hunter's bike which royally ticked Hunter off! He was determined to never ride his bike again. Kevin worked with him but he kept falling off. The next day I tried working with him but without a sidewalk it is pretty difficult to help Hunter and keep Rusty from riding off to far. So I took them to the park. I got Hunter to trust me enough to help him and we worked for about 10 minutes and he was off on his own until he need to stop of course. But he never got hurt. The next day we practiced stopping and taking off and now he is a PRO! Now Rusty really can't catch up! It is awesome to see the two of them learn new things.
Hunter has also start T-ball I'll try to get those pictures posted soon.

Dad was transferred today to a Rehab hospital for Respiratory therapy. The best news is that that the biopsy showed no Cancer but they will continue to monitor him. It is so amazing to see him after what he has been through. None of us thought he would make it through. Obviously miracles do happen. the nurses and doctors have told him that they never expected him to live after all he went through last Monday. GOD is awesome. I know all the prayer from family and friends were heard and answered. Now maybe dad will see life in a new light and make some changes.

We are waiting for results to come back on his biopsy. They found what looks like a tumor in his lung. Thursday was a hard day for all of us. He was out again and the news about his lungs hit hard. Friday was a little better because he could look at us. Last night at our last visiting hour. Dad kept smiling and pointing across the room and then back behind me. I could pictures angel or my pap standing behind me looking over my dad. At first it scared me and made me think of death. But then to think that my dad was smiling put my heart at ease. His nurse last night was great she even had dad laugh a few times. I can't wait to get back up there:)

Good news!!! They took dad off some of the medicines and he woke up. he can't talk because of the tubes but he can use his hands to tell you something and he looks at you and tries to talk! It is one of the greatest feeling ever:) I look forward to getting there and him holding my hand again. They are going to put him back under today and do the scoping to see what is bleeding. He is still losing blood. They gave him 2 more pints yesterday. Well that is all for now. This is a miracle in my eyes:)

I am home for a little bit with the boys today while Kevin goeas to work and then I am going back to the hospital. Sorry for any spelling mistakes. I simply can think straight. They have taken away most of dad's ivs but he is still out and will be for a while. he has pnemonia which is not what caused the problem but it is there. They are not going to do a scoping to see where the blood was coming from because they are worried it will start again. Right now they want to get him in a better stable condition. he has been paralized so he can not breath on his own. He is sedated and cannot wake up along with the medications a they are given him. They did start a feeding tube yesterday and his body is excepting it. However they can not get his blood pressure or Blood sugar to regulate. It is all a mystery in my mind. I know and have been told that he doesn't take care of hi body and that the alcohol and cigareetes have done a lot of damage. I only hope that if he wakes up he will make some changes. He can't fix past damage but he to help himself. My dad has been an alcholic and smoker for 50 years Keep praying. I can't stand being at the hospital or at home. I just wish it would all go away.

It has never hurt so much!

I was was waken this morning by kevin. He told me to get up and get dressed my dad was in the hospital. He has been throwing up blood. They really aren't sure that he is going to make it. He is on oxygen, 7 IVS, and lots of medication. They want to do a scope to see where the blood is coming from but they want him to be stable before doing thatKevin made me come home tonight and I really am scared to not be there but it is probably for the best. I am so tired. I have known for years that his day was coming but it doesn't make it any easier. I love my Daddy! I have told him many times today. But he is out. I know he can hear me but I just wnat him to wake up and hug me. I know God has a plan and I just want my daddy to be ok. And if that is not his will then I need stength and whatever there may be to make it all go away. My mom is trying to be strong but I know it is tough. Please keep him in your prayers.

The Crabtree Family has been very busy! I hope to make it through this week without a doctor visit of some sort. We have had a little bit of everything, bronchitis, sinus infections, strep, pink eye, ear infection.... I am having problems with my back or my left side and no I have not been to the doctor I am too busy taking care of everyone else but I have made a promise to Kevin that if it is still bothering me by Monday that I will make a Doctors appointment.
The other thing we have been busy with is my brothers wedding! Yes, they are finally married. Hip Hip Hooray! Through the ups and downs of plans it turned out beautiful. I still can't get over the fact that my brother is old enough to get married. Celinda is now my Sister in law and I love her to death. Actually getting to the wedding date nearly drove us all insane but we all survived and hopefully no ones feelings were to hurt.

Presenting to you Clint and Celinda Bush

This is my mom and dad with the bride and Groom!

This is my handsome big boy, Hunter!

And here I am with the love of my life

And here I am with my brother and the bridesmaid.

On know this is late, but better late than never!

On February 12, 2003 at 11:57 pm my Hunter was born at a big 9lbs 11 oz. Hunter was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. All that black hair was amazing and his blue eyes! Every inch of him was just perfect.

The picture on the left is me holding Hunter for the first time! The picture on the right is Hunter about 30 minutes after he was born when we were able to share him with our family!


It is hard to bleieve that it has been FIVE years since Hunter came into our lives. That day my life changed in amazing ways. Becoming a mother was the best moment of my life. I don't think it can be topped. Anticipating his arrival for 9 months was an incredible journey all on it's own. But seeing him & holding him for the first time was ..... I can't even think of a word. I just cried when I saw him. The pain was gone and my heart was overfilled with joy! I remember them saying they were going to take him for testing really quick especially since he was so big. I didn't want them to take him. I had just laid my eyes on him and they wanted to take him away! I could not wait to get him back in my arms. I remember those nights in the hospital. Holding him, walking around the room singing to him and still crying. I could not get over the fact that this little baby boy was mine.
Here are pictures of Hunter at each of his birthdays.

Hunter's 1st Birthday

Hunter's 2nd Birthday!

Hunter's 3rd Birthday

Hunter's 4th Birthday

Hunter's 5th Birthday!

When I look a Hunter now I am just amazed at how much he has grown in a short amount of time. He has become his own person. Hunter I love you more than you will ever know! You still bring so much Joy and Happiness to my life1 I can't wait to keep watching you grow and change!

Update

The last two days Rusty hasn't even whimpered about me leaving him at the daycare. Monday I walked in and they got his breakfast for him and I sat him down and tried to sneak out but it didn't work. Hunter yells out" I need a hug" which is sweet but at the same time I needed him to be quite. So I walk back over give him hugs and Rusty says the same thing hugged and kissed him too and then left with no fuss or even a tear. I even got a bye mommy love you from Rusty:) And the same happened to day. Now if I can just get him to sleep at night I would have it made. They are both growing up and learning and it is incredible to watch. Rusty put his own shoes on and now will only let me help, he drinks out of a cup and not a sippy cup most of the time. Rusty is even asking at dinner to pray before we eat and sometimes at bedtime. Then we argue over who will pray before dinner is cold. Hunter loves to pray but bless his heart his prayers can last forever and then he throw in something silly. That's a four year old boy for you:)Hunter of course jokes around as always but is learning also. He is into rhyming. Every morning we rhyme and make silly words. Well off to hopefully sleep tonight. Rusty has a twin size bed and we hope that will be of some help. Only time will tell!

Starting KinderCare

Here is Hunter excited about his first day Of KinderCare! He decided he should give thumbs up. The First day of KinderCare Hunter was so excited. I woke him up and within 5 minutes he was completely ready to go, however mommy was not. Hunter had decided he would eat breakfast there which is unusual usually he wants to eat when his eyes open. Rusty on the other hand had woken up with a fever and for a couple days before had a bad cold and cough so he and I were going to stay home. A we drove to the KinderCare the boys argued over whose school it was. We went in Hunter hugged me and was ready for me to leave. Rusty on the other hand cried because he could not stay. I had to fight to get him back in his car seat and then he cried for the next hour about Hunter and school. I couldn't wait for Hunter to come home and tell me about his day. He came in all smiles and said it was great. The next day when we went to school Rusty got to go also and he was perfectly fine with me leaving. They said he did fine until the separated the two boys then he cried a lot:( They took him over to see Hunter at one point and Hunter told him " I told you to be good so stop crying" Patricia one of the many ladies at the daycare said it was all she could do not to laugh. Everyday after that he cried when I left and a lot throughout the day. It makes me so sad to think that he is there crying and I can't make him smile. The second week was a little harder. Monday I ended up crying with him. They told me that it would take about a month for him to adjust and not cry. So I am ready for the month to fly. He has gotten to the point where he doesn't cry all day and doesn't always want to leave. Hunter still loves it and talks about it all the time.

Here are pictures of our Holiday guest Joe Python. Joe came to our house over the holiday so that he wasn't stuck at school alone. The boys and I had fun with Joe but Kevin couldn't wait for Joe to return to school.

Here is the Love of my life. We have now spent 9 Christmas's together. Kevin means the world to me. I don't know what I would do without him.

A Wonderful Christmas

Our sweet family on Christmas Eve!

And this is my precious Meme with Hunter. I am so glad that Meme was able to join us for Christmas. She is very precious to me:)

My Dad and Rusty

Christmas has been a very busy time for the Crabtree's. We have seen lots of family and friends and open way to many gifts all of which we love. The boys have really enjoyed all their new toys. Rusty seems to just now be getting the hang of opening presents up. He likes to open one and then he wants to play, the others can wait. Every package both boys opened was followed by a "wow, or look mommy". And they have done a super job of remembering their thank yous. Hunter was really into knowing who each gift was from which was very precious. This year we stayed in Texas for Christmas but we were able to spend time with the Kevin's crew we usually meet up with in Nebraska. It worked out perfectly. Christmas Eve we went to my family and had Christmas. After dinner Santa came and we opened gifts. The boys are really amazed when they walked in and Santa had made a delivery! Santa brough Hunter a train and Rusty a tool bench with tool. And funny enough they switched gift just like last year. Which worked out just as well.There were three other kids there that night and they all had a blast playing with each other and they did so good also! Thank Goodness! That night we came home and had Kevin's
cousin stay with us.

I felt terrible because nobody got any sleep. Thanks to my Rusty~ I think Rusty was not meant to sleep. Maybe he was to excited! Anyways in the moring believe it or not Santa came and brough yet another gift. And here it is!

Even though it was freezing we bundled up in our PJs and went out to play. They both had a blast. I just love Rusty in his upside down glasses!LOL

You will notice that by the end of Christmas day even after a nap, Rusty was really really tired!

And these are pictures from a few days before Christmas with not only our wondeful friends both the God Parents of our boys and their two children

This was PJ day at Dana's and I gave the boys bed head for the day! They loved it:)

Well I hope everyone had a MerryChrsitmas and a wonderful New Year to Come:)